I’ve been pumped lately about the surreal idea that Georgia flipped to blue. Now we have a hand recount to do, but our Republican Secretary of State who, by the way, is in quarantine for the Covid (of course he is) thinks that there won’t be any “significant changes.” That got me to thinking. This has been one weird-ass year. But there are some positive things about living life in 2020. There have been some moments where I’m like, wow, I’m glad we aren’t dealing with that on top of everything else. Some examples of that below:
Talking to Strangers: Look, I’m not anti-social, but I am really, really introverted and talking to complete strangers stresses me the fuck out. I HATE small talk and that’s all you can do with a stranger. How ya like this weather? Do you think it’ll rain? I mean sure, I’m an amateur meteorologist, but I don’t care to investigate weather patterns with the woman behind me in line at Kroger. The Covid has saved me from this. Though o have noticed saying hi is acceptable now, especially since we are all in masks and a stranger can’t see your smile. I’m okay with saying hello.
Waxing Less: If you’ll recall I told y’all about Burt the other day, my mustache that’s incredibly hard to tame. Well with masks I don’t really have to and truth be told, I might just always wear a mask from here on out when I’ve forgotten to take care of Burt, or haven’t had the time, or what have you. If it’s 2023, and this pandemic is safely behind us, and you see me in a mask, just say hi to me and Burt and go on about your day. It’s none of your damn business.
Pooping in Public Bathrooms: Before Covid the family and I used to travel and explore. Like a lot. Like three to four vacays a year, weekend excursions, especially since we are so new to Atlanta. We would hop on the Marta on Saturday mornings and just see where we ended up. It was fun times, way back when. The problem was, I still have my stomach issues, ya dig? So you’d never know when I’d have to really let one loose. But it was bound to happen at the worst time, and public bathrooms became a thing I had to consider in my life. Not anymore. We don’t go anywhere. And if we do it’s not far enough for me to clench my butt cheeks to get back home and do my bidness. That alone had made this year invaluable.
Lady Winifred Beesly of Atlanta: We got a quarantine puppy, as y’all might remember. Back in April. She fit in Jerimiah’s hands. Now she’s bigger than Duke and has an attitude from hell, but still, Winnie girl was a good thing. Just look at her.
I’m sure there are more good things. School being virtual for Jackson (we get to eat together all day), Jerimiah working from home since March. Duke growing into a regal Poodle and becoming an awesome big brother, writing letters to friends, watching The Tiger King. But honestly not much can pass consistently pooping in your own bathroom. It’s kinda magical.