Headed back to the dentist today. Time to get my crown cemented on. This is my fourth one, so this is old hat for me, but last time I went in I got very sick afterward. It wasn’t related, but you know how your mind works. I’m nervous about people not wearing masks, I’m nervous about the way the dentist had my chair so far back last time that I was accidently waterboarded on occasion. I’m worried about being in a small place with people I don’t know and barely trust, for hours. Hoping it won’t take that long this time.

I’m pretty much worried all day, everyday now. Worried about one thing or the other. Even on days when my body feels better, my mind still wanders. To the worst case situation. The stress of virtual middle school this week. The start of my MFA program. That old feeling that I am in over my head. I’ve committed to something I don’t have the ability to finish. Committed to something I don’t have the mental capacity for. The talent for. The gusto for.

Maybe the dentist won’t be so bad. Hopefully it won’t.

Hope you are doing okay. Making time for yourself. Worrying less. Hope you are all safe.

M.